Catheters are great

Barry was in the hospital this week for surgery.  He had to share his room with three other men.  They were older gentlemen all in for different things, but the one thing they had in common was a catheter.  Barry was actually the only one in the room that didn't have to have a catheter.  What follows is a catheter tale.

The night before surgery, Barry was lying in his bed.  One of the roommates (we'll call him Theo) had just returned from surgery.  They were chatting and then suddenly Theo starting making noises.  Something along the lines of "ummmm...errrrrrr."  Barry asked what was wrong.  Theo then asked each man in the room if they had in catheters.  Two of them responded that they did and Barry said no.  They asked him why.  Theo said, "Oh, I thought I had one.  I just wet the bed."  Poor guy.  Although they had a nice laugh over it, I suppose the hospital staff should always tell you when you are catheter free.

The conversation remained on catheters.  Another man in the room (we'll call him Duke), starting talking about catheters.  "Catheters are great.  You don't have to get up to use the toilet," he says.  If you ask me, I'd say I'd prefer to get up to use the bathroom, but whatever you say Duke.  But, Duke didn't stop there...oh no.  He continues, "The only problem with him is that you can't get an erection and you can't go to the beach when you have a catheter."  Um, whaaaaaa?  Because the two go so perfectly together...erections and beaches?  And, do you normally get erections at the beach?  Totally confused by that one.  I'm hoping he meant because you can't go the beach with a pee bag (that's the medical terminology for it, too) attached to you, but hey, you never know.  Maybe he's like this guy:

Google Image Search (Yes, I searched for the term "beach erections.")

So there you go.  Catheters are great except when it comes to those pesky beach erections.